What’s one positive trait you’ve gained because of BPD?
Last Updated: 02.07.2025 14:09
Trauma never leaves you! Its actually lives in the fashia ,of the body .The connective tissue.
As i gave and gave ,everything to people, they began to use me.
As i do to all so called friends.?
Although we always gave her a kiss on the cheek. She would shrink away from it!
She married twice! .
Your thinking ,but those kids would have been street wise?
Novel coating shields iron from rust with 99.6% efficiency - Phys.org
.I left my 2 sons and my husband to do it. Instead of spending the day with them
Then he’ d take out his beloved lump hammer ,show it to the kids.
I was seconnd youngest,
Early AI investor Elad Gil finds his next big bet: AI-powered rollups - TechCrunch
You’d think that being brought up for so long, in those terrible circumsatances ,i would know the ways of people ,and the world, but i wasn,t in , nor of the world .
He call us down, from where ever he stashed each one of us ,that day ! We were kept seperate.!
He weighed in at 5 lbs .I was the second born, and i weighed 3 and a half pounds.
Is there any kind of mold that might be good for your skin?
I will be 64.
Its a big thing in the States for the last 25 years.
But ive been too sick for many years..
BPD only comes to a person who has suffered childhood trauma.
Insight, and i can spot a wrongin from 3 miles away.
He’d bring us out ,and we would form the position .
What is your language's pangram?
I don,t even have a pension.
Due to the real legacy of trauma (B.P.D)
When he wanted one of his lessons to be taught!
Jaire Alexander’s Contract Impeded Packers’ Trade Attempts - NFL Rumors - ProFootballRumors.com
And as she herself ,wasn’t kissed or touched as a child.
I said to her
The only rule us 5 kids had .
Marijuana Use Among Older Adults Climbs to New High - AARP
My family never makes their pension either.
I waited trembling.
Like some twisted love , they where addicted to each other
One Way of Drinking Coffee Could Help You Live Longer, Study Finds - ScienceAlert
He resisted the act ,that day.
I watched his eyes light up and his twisted smile rejoice, in his joy of it all.
I only knew my twisted world , and there, is no choice for a child but to live in it. Or Die in it!
Stunning Space Film Premieres June 9 at Natural History’s Planetarium - West Side Rag
I ended up cooking for her, and bringing her eveywhere with us.
I let him have the joy of his friends( that i would never know myself.!)
And i lived it daily.
Thousands of Netflix fans gather for Tudum - TechCrunch
All the time i was locked up.
My twin will have involuntary pissed himself, but not me at least not, that day!
With Catholic nuns and Church on Sundays.
I did it because my mum asked me too!
I had many talking therapys , but they just don,t work.
It comes from Big T Trauma and is no fault of anyone who has it.
Check your tickets! Winning MegaMillions ticket sold in Ohio - WHIO TV
She stayed with him because she thought he,d grow out of it. He didn’t of course!
As is all addictions, people can’t leave off.
I suffer greatly, because of BPD..
They are buried together, in the same grave..
Even in the coal hole, i said the lines in my head..
And who doesn’t know suffering?
Because , i didnt have the heart to hurt my friend.!.
The only way to get rid of it forgood ,is sommence therapy,
Ive learnt so much.
19 years ,i spent with dear old papa.
Why did i forgive my father ?
Ther’s very good reasons why i was left alone.
That life, was meant to be , as the world teaches us great lessons, and leaves us many gifts.
He said i reminded him of an old aunt ,who used to beat him, and when the menapause came, she was placed in a mental home and never was released ,until she died.
Its mostly always from childhood abuse .
But, we were locked up after school.
Mine was extreme ,and lasted 19 years
My place (mostly )was the coal hole..it was a small room heaped with coal .
Took her away on holiday ,with us, my 2 pugs her dog, a Jack Russell.
The apprentership one gets in Extreme Big T Trauma childhood is insight and extreme awarness.
And when you live in a life , of being terrified, and shocked, and permantly stressed; especially as a child born in to all this .
A line in front of him, from the eldest to the youngest.
I got to know the terrible awful childhood, he had himself. And his Jolly Pub Persona.
She was in good health!
I was writing from the time i was a small child.
And ive living now since 2005, on disablement .(Which is a pittance)
But i went to school ,and was locked up evey evening , until he was off out on a bender..then mum would set us free, and we,d be bouncing off the walls,
And, all my friends down the years ,where users.
But he said ,he was sick of her anyway ,and only put up with her as i had a friend ,and seemed to be happy.
For him, I cleaned and cooked and shopped, and spent the whole day, doing a weeks work) in the only day off, i had, besides Sunday.)
On the 31st of Jan this month .
Where the ultimate outsiders.
We could never speak unless he spoke to us!
She died at 55 of colon cancer.
I do have abandomment issues but they come from being left alone ,without my mum, or any of my family in a incubator for 4 months.
But there where , these other acts only us 2 girls, would receive, (When id have rather had his lump hammer , and chisel.).
Im dying but, im not bitter.
When she asked me how she looked .
I was very sick at this time too.
One cannot hold on to bitterness.
Stress hormones Adrenaline and Cortosol ,would have flooded my brain, and they never left it!!!!
He said i’d end up like her, and he laughed his big rolicking bear of a laugh!
But im an empath, and i help lots of people.
So he went home with my mum to her 2 other children.
His abuse (his own) began at 2 years of age. His mothers friend, sexually abused him, from the age of 2.
I write beautiful poetry .
I know ,a lot about trauma.
Then later on when my husband had gone to the bar..she started telling me, that they where having a affair, and that he loved her much more then me ,and other loads of visious lies.
It was going to be , some day.
But i am married 43 years to my husband this July !
I had hoped to write a book about this .
I couldn’t, believe it.
His mum and dad ,were Alcoholics!
Comes on , in middle age.
She got all dolled up, but it looked as she was dressed up to play the part of , Florence Nightingale ,as she descended down the cottage stairs ,like a Queen.
I was 9 years of age.
She was a women, a mother with her own children!.
I never cut or harmed myself..
I did write a poem about him though, and my mum.
I forgave my father, and i took care of him ,until his death in 1999..my mum left us on the 29th Jan 1998.
Put me off passion for life!!
So, i spoilt her more .
I was scared of men, in general
The same beautiful brown eyes my mother loved so much!
We wern’t close any more, the family fractured, after my Mothers death, and seeing me annoyed them ,as i was the familys scapegoat..
Its like, taking poison, and hoping the other person will die.
I worked then as a chef ,and a very good one.
I was the most vunerable of my siblings. I was born small ,and was sickly ,and of course none of us could ever thrive!
He isn,t a very sexual person at the best of times!
I am a twin , my twin is a boy called Alan. I had a sister and 2 other brothers
But my sister and my other 3 brothers wouldn’t have come near him every again!
I immediatly know and see what their chidhood was. I tell them you had a awful time in childhood.
Her first husband, had been a gay man ,and he was a lovely person.
My mother wasn’t a tactile women ..only as babes could she touch us. After we grew ,she couldn,t touch any of us.
And i know him well ,and every thing about him. This relationship, is the only real one iIve been able to keep!
We were not on the streets..
Especially a lifetime of it.
I think the readers, may guess!
But it wasn’t much.
Why do we forgive? Because if we don,t
My familys so full of ancestral BIG T Trauma.
One cannot live in the past .
(And it was in our own minds.)
At this time i had honed my heart to the same, as that of a lion and i knew i wouldn’t beg or cry ,nor plead.
She died young (from the stress and abuse of Big T Trauma) of liver cancer!
Would this be the day?
5 of us kids, and it wasn’t a big house.
He was a brick layer (when he worked at all) and he carried his tools around ,hanging from a money belt.
What did i know ?
He knew the spot.
As i said though i will be 64 on my last birthday!
Another so called friend had bit the dust..
One was a lump hammer, another was a iron chisel.
Because huge Trauma like mine is alive.
But it has taught me many things other people will , never know!
Trauma lives in the body, as ive explained, but it actually this that kills you in the end.
One women pretended to my husband she wanted to see me for coffee ,and make friends.
Was to survive, this bastard.
I only stopped writing poetry recently, because , of my brain tumor
We all went to grammer schools
He took out the hammer, and explained again, how the smallest tap ,of this hammer would kill me in a second.
She found it foreign!.
Yes, a stroke or heart attack is the reason on your death certificate.
I forgave my father,, and in those years i cleaned and looked after him .
He did pay me though, i made him (.After i’d trudged miles to get his pension ) Before ,it all was gone, over the pubs counter!
So i became my fathers slave and he hated me the most.
I had offered the whole expense of the holiday to her, free.
I have no regrets .
Being very nice and never wanting to say the wrong thing.
I could never make a relationship work though!
He’d sit me down, and stand behind the chair, Then he’d make a great show of his beauty (the chesil )and place it behind my neck ,at the base!
I might have to go back 30 generations or more..
It will be my last birthday ,as im dying of a brain tumor and 8 other autoimune diseases.
This is soul school!.
Thats being isolated in a house, locked up as a child .We never saw any people except in School and we had no relatives in Liverpool!
Why ? because Trauma depletes the immune system.you get terribley ill , with chronic disease from all the horror ,and stress of it.
Im a true spealist, because i study it for years .And i still do..
Im kind ,and give many things, inc money ,to any of persons in need. I have a groups of homeless beggars ..i help out daily. They all know me by name!
We born here on earth , for the soul to learn , the contrast, of heaven.
One of his many names for me was Runt .He like that it rhymed with (well you know)
Im still living with it.
She said her life with him ,was love, and spoke to me of all the passion, it had brought her.
But im a psyci anyway, and i read energy and people, .
I was grabbed out of my mother hung upside down, and rushed up to the prenatal ward, to spend 4 mths alone, with, only medical staff.
Those are used to try and block the pain, like that of my life out..
And as runt ,of the litter .Which of course, i actually was!
Im constanly in a state of FLIGHT or FIGHT my whole life
Do all the shopping, and cooking and look after all the dogs.
He was dying to do it , i knew.
The coal was sharp, and i usually had no underware! So my bare arse ,was cut and rossened on the coal..
My life is so biszare .
She was deluded, and thought she could stay on for the reminder of the holiday!
You don’ t get a state one here , in England ? until your at least 67 yrs old ! Im 63.
Rather to engertic for me ,with my terrible health, but i was left to run the house, it was a Cottage in Dorset.
My mum and dad in the seventies!
So whats the point in blame.
Thats was my nicest nick name for him
Youll pack your bags and leave Dorset.
My dad was a alcholic psychopath, and violent in the extreme.
Also my liver and lungs are fatally diseased!
Although he,d calmed down a bit ..he still shouted his orders at me and thought , my older sister would be better at the job..
My only sister also couldn,t make her life work.
She wouldn,t have been !
We didn’t no it wasn;t normal life..we were isolated, and taken from Dublin in Ireland ,where our whole mothers family lived , to Liverpool in England!
He had many friends, who didn,t know the home devil he was, for his sake ,i never enlighted them either.
Who then, do I blame.?
I of course replied” arh beautiful!
This is how, and why children get BPD.
She loved him until the end.
They look at me amazed ,and ask me how i could possibly know it?
Anyway ,i could never hold on to a relationship.
I wasn’t taught any boundries, our home ,was like any war zone , and Dad told us, he had bodies buried, under the floor boards.
Everytime, i saw a chronically ill person in middle years.
And don,t forget my 4 months alone, in the incubator. Knowing my brother in the womb and my mother voice .The baby knows she’s alone!
We were all going out this night to a fancy resteraunt.
And if you hold on to hate you only die inside yourself,!
As his daughter ,he didn’t even think I wouldn,t do it. (Look after him)
But people really die of the Big T Trauma!!
But im dying ,and its too late for me.
As she had lost her son ,to fatty liver disease!
Anyway, i told my husband ,and he was gobsmacked.